high on life

forgot about lj

Thu, 18 Aug 2005 05:28:32 GMT

well i have not written in here forever... but today I feel like writing. I finally have my baby back- he had an awesome time in panama- thank God. I missed him like peanut butter misses jelly! It is so nice to be with him again. Today we went and saw Duece Bigalo, despite awful reviews. Worst movie I've seen this century. But hey, I was with him and that's all that matters. Eric took me to a nice Italian restaurant, and hm I finally got my check from work. I have a lot of money that I owe people, but it still leaves me with pocket cash. Tomorrow morning i have orientation with IVC, get to put my schedule together, and then have the day to chill. Time is going by way too fast; in the past there was nothing that i wanted more than to speed up time, but now I want to slow it down with all my strength. I have less than a month until eric leaves. A month is nothing. A month is everything.

Tue, 16 Aug 2005 00:46:57 GMT

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Tue, 19 Jul 2005 16:40:05 GMT

i don't want to live here anymore.

Sun, 10 Jul 2005 01:28:15 GMT

My eyes land on the picture on my night stand as I wake up from un-needed sleep
the clock looks at me as if serving as a reminder
you fool
i have nothing to remember
the sun mocks me so i turn into my sheet
too lazy to close the blinds
damn mom always opened the blinds as if
the sun could cheer me up
my pillow is warm, so i turn it over
the coolness kisses my cheek
i think of him
and my eyes land on the picture on my wall as i fall back asleep

Thu, 30 Jun 2005 01:28:15 GMT

Motivated by
the running water in my dirty tub
Letting it continue to fill up over my eyes
and
over the sides
til
the floor is drenched and i slip and fall
trying to get to the door

Thu, 16 Jun 2005 00:28:12 GMT

somebody pinch me
i've gotta be dreaming

i thought i was tired

Thu, 09 Jun 2005 14:45:49 GMT

i had a dream last night
and i didn't want to dance
i would have melted in your arms,
but i sure would not have danced
next to the girls screaming about their mirror's disapproval

this too shall pass

Thu, 09 Jun 2005 01:30:42 GMT

and i can't wait.

why aren't you smiling?

Fri, 03 Jun 2005 15:30:49 GMT

because that wasn't what i wanted to hear.

1 down, 2 to go

Wed, 25 May 2005 18:43:21 GMT

Yesterday I presented in the senior project fair, and I passed. What a gigantic weight off my shoulders! But I have an econ project and 16 page marine bio project due this week. After this week, school will all be smooth. I AM SO EXCITED!!!

update

Tue, 10 May 2005 00:15:39 GMT

Nicole got a 2-month-old pure white english bulldog today. Her name is Puca- the new member of our family! She is a doll!
Prom is in THREE DAYS!!!!
Leah called me today asking if I want to work with the kid's unit at the new church. CH- YAH!

Sun, 08 May 2005 00:37:59 GMT

Jacqi called me today!

Another reason to smile

Tue, 03 May 2005 17:50:02 GMT

Yesterday was mine and my love's 6 month anniversary. I had the time of my life with him- yesterday and the past half year. I went to dinner with my older sister last night and on natalie's bib read- In 8 months, I'll be a big sister. I wanted to cry and scream and laugh at the same time! I already have a feeling it is a boy. Awww I am so excited to have another niece or a nephew! My sister is so happy. I love her and I love her life! There really is so much beauty it could make you cry. Brooke comes home today- that is totally going to brighten adam's life. And I will have another sister to hang out with =0) Prom is coming up in less than two weeks! I am SO EXCITED!!! I can't believe I am going to prom! Sometimes I still feel like I am 12. hahaha.
I thank the Lord sooo much for my life and the people he has blessed me with. I don't think I could be happier.
Thank you

Wed, 27 Apr 2005 02:24:20 GMT

I found the two MOST AMAZING prom dresses- thanks to Kelly!

Breathe (2 AM)

Tue, 19 Apr 2005 04:33:44 GMT

2 AM and she calls me 'cause I'm still awake
"Can you help me unravel my latest mistake?
I don't love him
Winter just wasn't my season.
"Yeah, we walk through the doors
So accusing their eyes
like they have any right at all to criticize"
Hypocrites! You're all here for the very same reason."

But you can't jump the track
We're like cars on a cable
and life's like an hourglass glued to the table
No one can find the rewind button girl
so cradle your head in your hands
And breathe, just breathe

In May he turned 21 on the base of Fort Bliss
"Just a day," he said, down to the flask in his fist
"Ain't been sober since maybe October of last year."
And here in town you can tell he's been down for a while
but, my God, it's so beautiful when the boy smiles
Wanna hold him
Maybe I'll just sing about it

But you can't jump the track
We're like cars on a cable
and life's like an hourglass glued to the table
No one can find the rewind button girl
so cradle your head in your hands
And breathe, just breathe

There's a light at each end of this tunnel
You shout 'cause you're just as far in as you'll ever be out
and these mistakes you've made,
you'll just make them again if you only try turning around

2 AM and I'm still awake writing a song
If I get it all down on paper it's no longer inside of me,
threatening the life it belongs to
And I feel like I'm naked in front of the crowd
'cause these words are my diary screaming out loud
and I know that you'll use them however you want to

But you can't jump the track
We're like cars on a cable
and life's like an hourglass glued to the table
No one can find the rewind button girl
so cradle your head in your hands
And breathe, just breathe

Mon, 18 Apr 2005 04:49:26 GMT

weekends are too short.

Thu, 14 Apr 2005 19:12:24 GMT

You scored as Peter Pan.

http://quizfarm.com/results.php

Your alter ego is Peter Pan. You are a child at heart. Anything you believe is possible, and you never want to grow up.
Snow White

75%
Peter Pan

75%
Sleeping Beauty

69%
Cinderella

69%
Pinocchio

69%
Goofy

63%
Ariel

56%
Donald Duck

38%
Cruella De Ville

38%
The Beast
38%

Wed, 13 Apr 2005 03:07:32 GMT

High endurance paints the streets
Of miserable sheep
Dragging their feet
The dogs run after them,
barking away.
The sheep get together and obey
Time progresses
The sheep continue to drag their feet
and the dogs lay like slugs;
they both fall asleep.
The sheep run into this durable street
Get hit by cars,
fall to their feet
The dogs lie comfortably in their delusional bed
And as they are dreaming,
White wool turns to red

Wed, 13 Apr 2005 03:07:14 GMT

The sun failed her,
Just as he always did
Yet the moon proved promising when promises became unnecessary
He sparked a smile at a blind stranger
and the stranger stopped and
smiled back...

world population

Tue, 12 Apr 2005 15:30:09 GMT

6,430,187,886

Mon, 04 Apr 2005 17:48:48 GMT

two words:
SPRING BREAK

Wed, 30 Mar 2005 02:46:24 GMT

Yay for late start- picnic with Eric tomorrow morning! Woo hoo! This week needs to hurry up and end so Spring break can start! =0)

RIDDLE

Sat, 26 Mar 2005 05:01:56 GMT

You whiz around the corner in your rented moped when suddenly you're forced to come to a sudden stop.

It seems a funeral procession has stopped for a quick breather. Empathy overwhelms you and you offer your condolences to the whimpering man nearby. "Were you close?" you ask, wishing you hadn't.

After a moment, the man replies, "Brothers and sisters I have none, that man's father is my father's son."

That sounds sarcastic, you think to yourself. Maybe the guy doesn't want to tell you, which is fine, but there's no reason to be a jerk about it.

Or, perhaps the clever among can see this is the real answer.

answer-
v
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He's the father

here comes the sun dodadodado

Thu, 24 Mar 2005 19:06:12 GMT

My dad came home last night. Everything happens for a reason... inconsistency is just tough. I ate dinner with him and we went to the spa. I had fun attempting to solve riddles with eric on the phone last night. Today is another cold day! Where is the sun? Adam and Brooke leave to La Jolla today to spend their 6th month anniversary- luckies! They are the cutest- I love brooke! I hope it rains today and then clears up for this weekend. It is supposed to be sunny Saturday, so that will definitely be an all day pool-day. Then Sunday is easter, and I am so excited! =0) It better be clear out on Easter...

I have hands that wave at you,
Though I never say goodbye.
It's cool for you to be with me,
Especially when I say, "HI."
What am I?

AN ELECTRIC FAN

the calender hung itself

Tue, 22 Mar 2005 18:52:20 GMT

Does he kiss your eyelids in the morning when you start to raise your head?
And does he sing to you incessantly from the space between your bed and wall?
Does he walk around all day at school with his feet inside your shoes?
Looking down every few steps to pretend he walks with you.

Oh does he know that place below your neck that is your favorite to be touched,
and does he cry through broken sentences that I love you far too much?
Does he lay awake listening to your breath?
Worried you smoke too many cigarettes.

Is he coughing now, on a bathroom floor?
For every speck of tile there's a thousand more,
you won’t ever see.
but you must hold inside yourself eternally.

Well I drug your ghost across the country and we plotted out my death.
In every city, memories would whisper, Here is where you rest.
I was determined in Chicago but I dug my teeth into my knees,
and I settled for a telephone and sang into your machine.
You are my sunshine, my only sunshine.
You are my sunshine, my only sunshine.

And I kissed a girl with a broken jaw that her father gave to her.
She had eyes bright enough to burn me. They reminded me of yours.
And In a story told she was a little girl in a red-rouge, sun-bruised field
and there were rows of ripe tomatoes where a secret was concealed.

And it rose like thunder, clapped under our hands.
And it stretched for centuries to a diary entry’s end
where I wrote,
You make me happy
oh when skies are gray.
You make me happy oh when skies are gray, and gray, and gray.

Well the clock’s heart it hangs inside its open chest
with its hands stretched towards the calendar hanging itself
but I will not weep for those dying days.
For all the ones who've left there's a few that stayed.
And they found me here and pulled me from the grass where I was laid.